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No wonder dad’s lonely.

Thinking about that time when I opened up to you about my first email lover. I was fifteen years old and it’d taken me weeks to build up the courage to finally spill. You guys were so fucking clueless. Yeah, just respond to my natural desire for love and validation by cutting me off from […]

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I don’t like you.

Now that I know myself it’s hard looking back on all those years I spent trying to make you love me. And all the while you were programming me to feel shame for so many aspects of my true self. Who does that? You always made me feel small, Mom. Maybe that’s because you were […]

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I want you to be well.

Countless sessions of cognitive behavioural therapy with various therapists over the years coupled with taking the time to go through medication after medication until I finally landed on the one that has made worlds of difference without any unmanageable side effects (I’ve been on citalopram for almost a year now.) have allowed me to make […]

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I wish I could talk to you.

Wow, Mom, I tried to open the lines of communication because I miss you and I feel like you just shut me down. In fact you’ve been shutting me down all year, so I have to ask you to get off your high horse and have a little human decency and be fucking honest with […]

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I know that deep down you are a beautiful person.

I have some thoughts I’d like to express. I would like to have a relationship with my mother. But before that will be possible, we need to have a little heart to heart. Or at least, my heart to yours. I know that deep down you are a beautiful person, full of love and empathy […]